Can You Go 24 Hours Without Complaining?
Can You Go 24 Hours Without Complaining?
By James Porter
What would happen if, for the next 24 hours, you made a conscious decision not to complain? No venting about the weather, no muttering under your breath about the slow driver in front of you, no ruminating over a co-worker’s passive-aggressive email. Just one full day of refraining from verbalizing or even mentally fixating on grievances.
This challenge—going complaint-free for a full day—is closely tied to another idea: spending 24 hours focusing solely on what you want, rather than what you don’t want. It’s a shift in mindset that moves away from resistance and resentment toward clarity and intentionality. And yet, for many of us, this shift is harder than it sounds.
I’ll admit, I tend to view life through a lens of disgruntlement. When things don’t go the way I think they should, I get frustrated. I don’t lash out; instead, I suppress the anger, stuffing it down in the name of civility. But that doesn’t mean it disappears. Instead, it festers, leading to more frustration, more mental clutter, and ultimately, more suffering.
Albert Ellis, the co-founder of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), famously pointed out that we often say, “Things upset me,” when in reality, the more accurate statement is, “I upset myself.” In other words, the external world is not inherently frustrating—it’s our reaction to it that creates distress. And when we complain, we reinforce this cycle of self-inflicted suffering.
So how do we break free? How do we cultivate equanimity—the ability to remain mentally calm, even in the face of frustration? Here are five actionable steps to help you go complaint-free for 24 hours and, more importantly, rewire your mind to focus on what you want rather than what you don’t want.
1. Practice Awareness: Catch Yourself in the Act
Before you can stop complaining, you have to become aware of how often you do it. Complaints can be sneaky—they might not always come out as direct grievances but rather as sighs, eye rolls, or sarcastic remarks. Start by simply noticing each time you’re about to complain. If it helps, keep a small notebook or use a phone app to track each instance. You might be surprised at how frequently you engage in this habit.
2. Reframe the Situation
Once you notice a complaint forming, pause and ask yourself: “Is there another way to look at this?” Instead of saying, “This meeting is such a waste of time,” try, “This meeting gives me a chance to better understand my team’s perspective.” Instead of thinking, “Traffic is awful,” reframe it as, “This is an opportunity to listen to a podcast or enjoy some quiet reflection.” By reframing negative situations, you shift from resentment to empowerment.
3. Shift Focus: Think About What You Want
A complaint often centers around something unwanted: “I wish my boss wasn’t so critical,” or “I hate how disorganized my house is.” Instead, try flipping the narrative to focus on what you do want: “I want to develop better communication skills with my boss,” or “I want to create a more organized living space.” This small but powerful shift reorients your brain toward solutions rather than problems.
4. Replace Complaints with Gratitude
Gratitude is the antidote to complaining. When you catch yourself wanting to grumble, pivot to something you’re grateful for. If you’re irritated about waiting in a long line, take a deep breath and think, “I’m grateful to have the resources to buy what I need.” If you’re frustrated with a friend’s behavior, consider, “I appreciate the good times we’ve shared.” Gratitude rewires your brain to focus on abundance rather than lack.
5. Set a Positive Intention for the Day
Before the day even starts, decide that you will focus on what you want rather than what you don’t want. Take a few moments in the morning to set a clear, positive intention: “Today, I will focus on solutions rather than problems,” or “I will approach challenges with patience and perspective.” By proactively choosing your mindset, you create a mental framework that makes it easier to avoid complaints and negative thinking.
Final Thoughts
At first, going 24 hours without complaining—or even just 24 hours of focusing only on what you do want—might feel unnatural. That’s because, for many of us, complaining has become a default setting. But with awareness, practice, and a commitment to reframing our thoughts, we can begin to cultivate a state of mind that is more peaceful, more constructive, and ultimately, more fulfilling.
So, are you up for the challenge? Can you go a full 24 hours complaint-free? The real question isn’t whether life will cooperate with you—it’s whether you’re willing to see it through a different lens.
Erica Tuminski
Author